44: Home

Hello, Happy Sunday, I’m typing this Saturday night extremely relaxed. Wednesday night I went to Ashe Wednesday service at a Catholic church. I was raised by Lutheran, but my dad’s side of the family is Catholic, so while I know nothing about the catechism, I feel pretty comfortable in mass. Wednesday night dinner was coconut shrimp from trader joe’s, Friday night dinner was grilled cheese and tomato soup. I don’t know what dinner will be next Friday, but either shrimp pasta or scallop tacos is likely. It’s Lenten season and while Lutheran’s aren’t as likely to avoid meat on Fridays, I look at it more as a culinary challenge and an embracing of Catholic faith.

After dinner Friday night I drove north with my significant other to Aitkin. We stayed at my parents house and spent Saturday doing all my favorite small town things. Breakfast at Roadside, visiting friends, attending a fundraiser for the city park at Block North, and meeting a friend for drinks and an app at the Forty Club. (yes, my favorite things typically revolved around friends and food, I see nothing wrong with this).

My friend had to head back to the cities Saturday night to play hockey Sunday morning. And while I could have joined, I did look forward to a night alone at my parents house. It doesn’t happen often, but typically I love it when it does. I remember a rough night last spring where I felt very low. I went for a solo bike ride, hoped to meet up with an old friend, but ended up getting blown off. I didn’t cry but I journaled for page after page wondering why I felt so alone, and if I’d have to feel that way forever.

Less than a year later I can say that I’m not alone, and I’m happy about the changes that have come. There was no one thing I did to click into a happier space, but it took a lot of faith and trying and forgiveness.

I love Aitkin, I’ll always love it. I have no idea if life will take me back to living there full time, but I hope it is a place I can always visit and feel at home.

1 Comment

  1. It sounds like things are going really well with your boyfriend! So happy to hear that you are happy. I know the feeling of wanting a special person so badly. It’s hard to believe it will happen for you when you are in the midst of being lonely. But I always remind myself that God has a plan. That was nice of you to go to Ash Wednesday Mass with your boyfriend. It can be hard to deal with different faiths within a relationship so it’s helpful when both people are open minded to supporting the other person in their faith.

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